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Self-Confidence through Eye Contact

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Build Confidence (Home) > Self Confidence Basics > Self-Confidence through Eye Contact

Improving Self Confidence through Eye Contact

It's a cliché to say that the eyes are the windows to the soul, but in more ways than one, they are. The eyes are also the mirrors of self-confidence. A person can easily assess another person's self-confidence by engaging in eye contact. People with low self-confidence hate making eye contact. They would tend to look at the ground as if they are looking for a lost coin.

The eyes are the first things which are noticed in the human face and they leave a long-lasting impression to the beholder. It's fairly normal to hear someone say "I like girls with beautiful eyes," when he is being asked about his idea of an attention-grabbing face. The eyes can make statements at a glance like no other part of the body can make. Imagine a short film which is entirely composed of a shot of a human face with the eyes slowly pouring out tears.

Even with no words, the eyes can reveal a lot about someone. A person who is trying to hide his unhappiness can never really pretend to be happy without people noticing it. The eyes can tell stories that are never meant to be told. They can decipher thoughts and insecurities which are engraved in the deepest holes of one's souls.

The eyes also act as a meter to one's self-confidence. The eyes play a big role in making relationships, building careers and in portraying sincerity and competence, in general.

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Girl in a Bar

Making eye contact can start relationships. For example, if a man finds a likable girl in a party or a bar, he would look at her when she is not looking, once the girl looks back, the man would try to hold his stare for a few seconds then he would turn away. He would repeat this set of moves for a few times while prolonging his stare after every move. He would then make his move towards the girl or back away permanently. What happens here? In making eye contact, one can convey interest towards someone else. The man's stare definitely should get the message across to the girl. Once the move is done, the reactions of the girl are assessed. Making eye contact is a give and receive thing. One must not only convey but he must also listen to the response through his eyes. Holding the right length of eye contact will set the move for introducing oneself. Holding eye contact to long may get someone accused of being a maniac or a freak, while not holding it at all will portray someone as shy person with a low self-esteem and a lot of insecurities.

Job Interviews

Interviews only last a few seconds long because more often than not, the verdict will be made through first impression. Making eye contact with the interviewer will make him see one's seriousness in getting the job. A lousy applicant will avoid eye contact because of fear. This is not a very good thing to do because interviews are primarily done to test someone's ability to handle pressure. Interviews are also meant to display someone's ability to express him or her self and what better way to instantly express one's personality than through eye contact?

Speaking in Public

One of the main factors that can make or break the delivery of a presentation to an audience is eye contact. Eye contact helps take the fear away from the speaker by getting the audience closer to him. Stress is mainly a result of being with the unknown and uncontrollable. Eye contact gives the speaker a picture of the reality that is the audience. It also helps in getting the attention of the audience. People in the audience would like to feel noticed and making eye contact with them makes them feel that the presentation is being delivered at the personal level.

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Making eye contact is an essential tool in expressing oneself and getting responses from others. The eyes can tell the story of someone's life in one glance. People should not be afraid or feel awkward in making eye contact as long as it is done in a courteous and proper manner.

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