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Build Confidence (Home) > Self Esteem Basics > You versus Me Attitude

Growing a "You" versus "Me" Attitude: A Three-Part Exploration of Egotism

Are you someone who is infected with this disease that has plagued mankind for quite some time now? Egotism or blown up ego. It is also known as self-centeredness, selfishness, and is related to vanity or conceitedness.

This disease is likened to an adhesive with which people get stuck with themselves. If you can't get away from yourself, then indeed you have it. Ever encountered people who are openly selfish and conceited? Those people who wave beggars away instead of sparing them a piece of bread or a penny? Those who can't think of anything but only themselves? Aren't they just annoying? Or, God forbid, are you one of them?

Symptoms of a "Me-Me-Me" Attitude

Here are some of the signs that you have actually been infected with this disease known as egotism-itis:

  • You think of beggars as low-life thieves instead of love-needing humans.

People who see others who are in need as plain parasites of the community don't realize that it is actually them who are in need. This means that people who judge other by the way they look are actually the people who lack a big part of their lives. They lack understanding.

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  • Your vocabulary is mainly composed of me, moi, yours truly, and I.

What could be more of an indication of selfishness than hearing someone talk about himself 24/7, right?

  • It always has to be "what's in it for me" when it comes to any of your endeavors.

You think that the whole world owes you a lot. So, everything that you do should benefit you and only you alone. Service means contributing something for his own advantage. It doesn't occur to an egotist that what's in there for him is the opportunity to give or to do something for someone.

  • The loss of others is your gain.

That's what you feel most of the time. When someone is empty you feel full. This easily translates to a person that lacks sheer concern for others. If you feel laughing when someone is just so grieving, surely, you have contracted the disease.

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Complications of a "Me-Myself-and-I" Attitude

Now, how do you treat this very maligning disease of selfishness? Here are some thoughts that might motivate you to deal with this condition by hook or by crook.

  • With conceit, which is the best friend of selfishness, there's no room for improvement. Since conceited people think highly of themselves, what else will motivate them to improve themselves, right?
  • Egotism backfires. A lot! A conceited person, in his desire to show how great he is, often makes a fool of himself. And this makes him show much insecure he is with himself.
  • With selfishness, a person becomes a big turn-off. This is one of the worst downside of this trait - the loss of loved ones or the lack of gaining some friends. What could be more repelling than knowing someone who only thinks of himself?
  • It is simply pointless to be selfish. This is because what made everyone become the person that he is today is through the help of another person.

Treating the "All by Myself" Attitude

After knowing the signs and complications of egotism here's a rundown of things you can do to gradually get rid of this communicable disease.

Egotism is founded by the thinking that we are different, that we are better than others. This can easily be destroyed by inculcating the fact that we are all the same. That we share the same fears, dreams, and hopes. What can be upsetting about that?

Superiority and inferiority is a dichotomy set by humans. It really is not one of the universal realities. If one continues to keep this dichotomy in mind, endless trouble will haunt him.

Also, a lack of judgment can easily lead to further trouble. Criticizing others which comes from plain narcissistic characteristics within yourself is one of the main causes of others miseries.

Always think of what you can contribute for the sake of being of help instead of being helped in the long run. This way you will reap what everyone has been struggling for - peace of mind.

Also, think of the truth in the words of Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe (1749 ~ 1832) that "He who does not think much of himself is much more esteemed than he imagines."

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